The Day of Fulfillment Arrives

Today I looked up my flight reservation and it said "2 days until check-in."  I remember when it said 65.  Two.  Days.  I don't think I've had this many butterflies in my stomach for Christmas since I was a kid.  And in all my adult years of hoping to re-create that childhood feeling of Christmas anticipation by receiving the greatest Christmas surprise or amazing present, how dreadfully obvious it is now that what would bring back that anticipation was just going home.  Being with loved ones.

And as I think about how excited I am to be reunited with my family, I think of the soldiers here who have been out for 9, 12, 18 months, most with a spouse and children. 

Last night I spoke to one of General Austin's aides and he talked about spending the last 15 months in Iraq with only one home leave for 18 days.  He has 4 kids and a wife waiting on him at home.  He told me that a couple nights ago he spoke to  his 7 year old son who anxiously reported that he had dug up his dad's baseball mitt in the garage and placed it next to his on his bedside table.  He told his dad that he would be counting down the days for a long awaited game of catch.   His dad asked him if it would be warm enough.  It didn't matter.   I can only imagine the joyful celebrations that will take place in so many homes across the country this Christmas season. 

Today is the day the soldiers leave.  And as I think about the 7 year old waiting at home with two mitts by his bed, it is with mixed emotions that I think about their leaving.  I'm so glad they are going home at last.  I'm also terrified they are leaving.  And I wonder how accurate all the media hype is and what is going to happen to this country - it appears to be on the brink of disaster.

I'm not the only one with mixed emotions.  I sense it when I talk to General Austin or hear an interview by General Helmick.  I hear stories from the troops I've met that illustrate all the mixed feelings they have about leaving.  They are excited to leave and to go home.  They are nervous about what will happen here.  And they want to feel like they've done their job and that they aren't walking out leaving it unfinished.  Like anyone, they want to take pride in a job well done.

It's a historic day.  Today is the day that they case (or retire) the USF-I flag in a ceremony symbolizing the full departure of the military from Iraq.  I feel surprisingly emotional and (less surprisingly) patriotic.  I would never have imagined being in Iraq to see the end of this war.  I never paid much attention to the war after the first couple of years - it simply wasn't a part of my daily life for better or worse.  But now I find myself in the middle of it.  And there is a part of me that will be proud to tell my imaginary children one day - I was there when the last soldier left Iraq.  I witnessed the end of a war from the front row.

And I hope that I won't tell them:  and I was there when they returned 3 months later.

Here's a link from the Today Show that shows some of the footage from the ceremony we shot in the morning.

Grateful for Chocolate

In the continuing spirit of emotion and gratitude, I'd like to share a story from an awards ceremony we held yesterday.

In the embassy here we have a unique partnership with the military.  Often State Department and Department of Defense (and any govenrment agency) are at odds.  Here the Commanding General and the Ambassador have a spirit of cooperation that trickles down through all of the embassy.  That spirit of partnership is found in the T.V. studio where I work with the military public affairs team closely.  Particularly with my trainer Seargent Buenavista.  First, a little context.

General Buchannan, who is the spokesperson for the military here, agreed to let Seargent Buenavista extend for 3 months to teach me how to run the televison studio.  Sgt. B has gone above and beyond in doing that.  He has been an invaluable resource.

Originally from the Phillipines, he came to the U.S. as a kid, got his citizenship and at 18 joined the reserve forces of the military.  He has served in Iraq for 3 separate tours. 

Sgt. B has the most amazing attitude.  He is always smiling, he says yes to solving every and any problem and he has had infinite patience in teaching a novice like me the ropes.  He made a challenging and at times painful process positive and pleasant.  He is the kind of person who literally is lit from within - the kind of person you want to photograph or see on film because of that light.

Yesterday the State Department had an awards ceremony to thank the J-9 team (military public affairs headed up by Gen Buchannan) for all they did to help Public Affairs - my group.  They gave certificates to the whole team, but they ordered a special merit award for Sgt. B to thank him for his over the top commitment and service.

There were two moments during this event that especially touched me.  The first was when they gave General Buchannan his certificate.  He said a few words and talked about how important our partnership has been.  He mentioned how uncommoon it is for the military and the DoS to work together so well.  He expressed gratitude for it, and I felt my heart fill with gratitude too.  This is the point where my eyes started welling up as I thought about all of them leaving.  Largely because I would miss them and because for the first time I've seen the military up close and have truly gained an appreciation for the service and sacrifice they render.  However when I was caught crying, I said that it was because the military was leaving me here alone to die!

Gen Buchannan also talked about the sacrifice that the DoS employees are making to be here.  Leaving families behind, risking their lives for the main purpose of doing outreach to the communities and helping to re-build them.  Teaching English, creating educational opportunities, etc..  He said that he realized after being here that we deserve the same kind of recognition that they get, but that while the military is easily recognizable in public places like airports and gets thank yous, we don't.  He expressed his simple gratitude to us for our sacrifice and it was touching.

(Ted Koeppel was here a month ago filming, and this excerpt from one of his shoots shows two of the women in our public affairs department.  I think you can see by their experience, exactly the challenges the General mentions.  http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/21134540/vp/45641261#45648913.  Their segment is towards the end.)

After the General sat down, they presented the special award for Sgt B.  By the time he got up there the tears were just flowing freely (and attracting some attention - I did reign in the loud sobbing noises) as I realized how grateful I was for him and his help and how much I would miss him. 

His words touched me and continued to emphasize for me the gratitude theme I keep bumping in to here - and in this holiday season.   I can't do them justice, or the passion with which he spoke them justice, but I'll try to recap the general meaning of what he said. 

He told us that for him everything started with a bar of chocolate.  That when he was 7 years old in the Phillipines a U.S. soldier reached out to him and offered him a bar of chocolate.  He was so happy for the chocolate and so impressed and touched by the soldier who would have chocolate and give it away that he decided he would one day be a U.S. soldier.  (A lofty dream for a kid who wasn't even a U.S. citizen - and it's no easy feat getting Visas from there!)  He didn't go in to the details of how it happened, but he did express great pride in the fact that he was standing there in a U.S. army uniform and representing a country he loved and was proud to be a part of.  A country that held a dream for him of a better life.  He said it's all about connections and he got quite emotional.  The soldier connected with him and that's all he wanted to do too-- build connections and help others.  He has.

I was overwhelmed by gratitude for his generous spirit, for his positive attitude in facing many life challenges to get where he is today and for HIS gratitude for a country that gave him opportunities - and how he gave back to that country.  Again I am reminded (and someone must really want me to get this!) by how blessed I am.  How important it is to be grateful for what I have and to find ways to give back.  I am inspired by positive people who face trials head on and lift others as they go.

The Weary World

Yesterday I met up with James for a few minutes in the afternoon and was surprised when he told me, "I cried today."

I'm not surprised that James cries, I have seen that in action - trust me, and crying at work isn't surprising, I personally try to do it at least once a quarter just to keep things fresh.  I was surprised that James had cried at work because even with all the stress and occasional problems that pop up, this was a first.  And you know, only women cry at work - it's a man's worst nightmare.

He told me a story about his morning at the Visa window.  James works with special visa cases - people who worked for the U.S. army, or helped the government in some way and now want or need to move to the States to be safe.  Some groups here don't like it so much when you help the U.S. if you catch my drift.

Each morning he interviews these applicants, and most have compelling and/or touching stories, but yesterday was especially heart-wrenching.  Here is the story in James' words:

Yesterday we had a number of special immigrant visa applicants who had to return to the Embassy to have their fingerprints taken again because there was a glitch in the system.   A gentleman stepped up to the window to have his fingerprints taken.  Many of the applicants plead with me and ask me to please speed up their case somehow; this man simply explained that he and all of his brothers had worked with the US military, and he lay recommendations and expired IDs on the counter in front of me.  

After I took his prints I asked if his daughter were there who also needed to have her prints taken.  He quietly explained that she had been kidnapped and probably killed, and he indicated that we should remove her name from the petition.
 
I hear stories that are similar to his everyday, but yesterday as I looked at this father, I was overwhelmed.  I thanked him for his time and excused him to sit down, and had to excuse myself from the window and go to my desk where I put my head in my hands and cried.

This is the reality of Iraq.  We live sheltered in our little compound here and don't see much of the "real world" with the odd rocket or gunfire warning reminding us of where we are.  But occasionally we read or hear stories that remind us that the people here are suffering in ways that we simply haven't experienced.

Most of us in the U.S. don't have to worry if we step outside of our house that someone is waiting to intentionally kidnap us or our children.  We don't have to worry that our house could be hit by a rocket, or that an IED would explode as we drive down the street.  We don't have a member of our family who has lost a limb because they were caught in the line of fire, and we aren't trying to seek asylum in a different country where we don't understand the language or culture just so that we will be safe and our children won't be kidnapped and killed.

It is sobering to consider the daily life of the average Iraqi (and many others in different countries) and as Christmas nears, I am particularly grateful to live in a free country where I feel generally safe, and where I have a voice that can be heard, and that even in a down economy offers so much more bounty and opportunity than people here will ever see.

Pardon me while I wax spiritual, but my heart aches for a man who lost his little girl and it is simultaneously full because I know that when we feel that level of pain, there is only one balm that can begin to heal us.  The words of the song O Holy Night are especially poignant to me here in Baghdad.  And as the birth of Jesus Christ nears, I am grateful for the hope He offers me in a weary world.  No matter what you believe, or who you worship, may you find peace on earth and in your heart and may we all help each other to "feel our worth" and to stop oppression. 

Long lay the world in sin and error pining.
Till He appeared and the soul felt its worth.
A thrill of hope the weary world rejoices,
For yonder breaks a new and glorious morn. 

Truly He taught us to love one another,
His law is love and His gospel is peace.
Chains he shall break, for the slave is our brother.
And in his name all oppression shall cease.

 

What lies ahead

The word on the street:

COM personnel are advised that at this time we are facing severe threats of kidnappings or other attacks against American Citizens, particularly USG employees.  These include threats against both International Zone and Red Zone travel. 

It's been in the news lately too, so you may have read it about. We didn't move around much to begin with, but I find it a bit unnerving that we can no longer walk across the street or go to a store in the green zone for flour. 

Baghdad 2012 - the new frontier.

GOP: When did Thinking go out of Fashion?

One of our chief forms of entertainment over here in Iraq has been watching the circus otherwise known as
the GOP.  Our biggest regret:  The debates are too late for us to watch.  Our biggest thrill:  SNL recaps on them.

My personal favorite was clearly the SNL take on Perry's "oops" moment.  Wow.  And it has certainly been a toss up for the last several months over who is going to say THE dumbest thing on TV or to the press today: Cain or Perry?  It's so delicious - a bigger guilty pleasure than People and US Weekly combined.   My greatest wish was that Sarah Pallin would be in the race so that Tina Fey would return.

(bonus: Link to John Stewart's take on the oops moment.)

In all the entertainment and spectacle, there is a nagging concern.  Yes, one thing troubles me.  The fact that GOP voters would find any, and I mean any acceptable candidate over Romney.  I understand why - people can't connect to him emotionally.  He is stiff and cool and lacks any appearance of human warmth.  It's hard to rally around a person with low to zero charisma.  I also understand that some in the religious right would rather vote for Hitler than a Mormon.  Fine.  But when you look at the opposition, isn't that rather shocking?

Two points that bother me:

1.  Cain was kicked out of the race for being a POSSIBLE (probable) adulterer and sexual harasser.  I think the guy is an idiot and am just as happy he's gone (except for the future SNL shows he's ruining for me) but I find it ironic that he is being kicked out on moral grounds and so the front runner becomes Gingrich.  A moral black hole.  Several affairs and wives later we find our moral compass and replacement for Cain.  Does anyone else see irony?
Note of interest: Romney is a family man, one wife, no tawdry affairs, generally moral and upstanding, but rejected.

Leading to point number 2.

2.  Romney flip flops.  Pause.  Think.
AND GINGRICH DOESN'T??  I don't care if you vote for Romney, Gingrich, or Obama, but please use some logic.  You can't put one candidate over another when he does the same thing.  Vote for Ron Paul if this is your argument, he doesn't flip flop, and while he also is largely not Republican at least I would get the logic in your choice.  Use your noggins GOP.  For the love.

And another thought on flip-flopping...so what?  Who CARES?  Every politician has changed his or her mind at some point.  Every HUMAN has changed their mind.  And in the case of Romney, here's how I see it:  He voted liberal when he represented liberals in a liberal state.  He is now voting conservative and looking to represent conservatives in the nation.  Isn't that his J.O.B.?  To not vote for his own opinion, but for that of We the People who he represents?  Shouldn't we be grateful he is open and flexible and will represent the voters who elect him? 
(And fyi:  Obama is like this and crosses lines and it's why I voted for him in the last election.)

One more thought.  Isn't this election about our failed economy?  Really, isn't it?  Hm.

Excuse the rant, but please.  I'm not political, but I am annoyed by stupidity.
God gave us our brains, shouldn't we use 'em?  If you can make a good case for any other candidate and why they are better, I'm all ears.  Not why Romney is worse, mind you, why THEY are better.  Because this campaign seems to be all about why people can't pick Romney instead of focusing on why they are picking anyone else.  And close scrutiny on any candidate other than him has only lead to one implosion after another.  

I don't care if you vote Democrat or Republican,  but I do care that you pick a GOP candidate that makes any sense at all.  Just try to stop making Republicans look so bad.  I don't want to be embarrassed if
I decide to vote that way.

It's beginning to look a lot like...

...Christmas.


In Baghdad. (black square covering top secret thing not allowed in pictures...oooohhh.)

Which isn't saying much, but I was happy to see a little bit of the holiday spirit show its face in the Middle East.  With 65 degree days and blue skies, tan buildings, and the daily calls to prayer it hasn't felt much like Thanksgiving or Christmas. 

A week or so ago my spirits lifted when I saw some employees walking down the street with giant snowflakes of light. 

It isn't much, but it's enough to put me in the holiday spirit and to start thinking about the fact that in T minus 15 days we'll be winging our way home to some real holiday spirit.

I'll try to ignore the fact that the secret service guy told me he'd be praying for my safety. :)

Desperately Seeking Shauri

 I looked at my blog stats today to see if anyone was reading it.  One of the stats they give you are search terms that people use to locate your blog.  This one cracked me up:

shauri quinn blog die

So many directions to go with this.  I'd like to hear yours.

Visits Cloaked in Darkness

This week the embassy got a bit chaotic as we prepared for a super secret visit from Vice President Joe Biden.  We weren't allowed to speak his name until the moment he arrived so there was a really interesting array of code words used to talk about and plan for this visit.  Of course the complete irony of all our secrecy is that the Iraqi press was printing stories the week before he came about his upcoming visit. 

I was assigned the job of "minder" for the NBC crew and Ann Curry.  My favorite line from all of her shoots here was to VP Biden when she asked him about the administration's claim that the country was "normalizing" and when it would be normalized enough that his visits could stop being "cloaked in secrecy and darkness."  Poetic.  And apt for the visit of the VIP who could not be named.

I really enjoyed spending time with the guys crewing NBC, as well as Ann and her producer Zoe.  I think Ann is a clever, high energy, driven, professional and kind person.  What I didn't enjoy so much was the 2:30 am live feeds for Nightline and the set ups that started at 11:30pm in 30 degree weather. 

I did get to stand in for Ann during set up and get a small glimpse of how it would feel to be a reporter for CNN.  I had the IFB in my ear and got to count down with NBC in New York to make sure the timing wasn't too delayed.  I'm pretty sure I counted so well and looked so hot at 2am in my 12 layers of James' clothing, that they were ready to ask me to stay and Ann to go.  Just see that sexy hat and red nose.

To see Ann's version of this shot you can click on this link.  Also, you'll get a glimpse of the DFAC where we eat during her walk and talk.

I think the highlight of the week was meeting Biden.  On  Thursday morning we set up for an interview for the Today Show in the Ambassador's residence.  Ann had 15 minutes with him and I was really impressed with the way he answered/handled her questions.  I was especially touched when he started to cry at the end as he spoke about the fallen soldiers and his son Bo who is in the military and served in Iraq.

See interview here: Today Show Link.

As soon as the interview finished the secret service was rushing everyone out of the residence.  I thought VP Biden was gone as well.  I went in to the living room and chatted with the NBC crew as they packed up.  One of the SS guys came by and I started talking with him in the door to the living room when I saw Biden enter the foyer.  Turns out the VIPs were waiting until the press left in their convoy and then following behind. 

Out of the corner of my eye I saw Biden notice us in the doorway, pass the Ambassador and General Austin, and wander over.  He said hello to Dave and I, and wandered in.  I told him that I was very impressed with his interview and touched.  He commented that he was embarrassed for getting so emotional.  I countered that it was the emotion he showed that most impacted me and allowed me to feel his authenticity.  He seemed to be happy about that and then he spent the next 10 minutes telling me and the 4 guys from the NBC crew stories about soldiers he met in Iraq and Afghanistan and some really touching moments with them. 

At one point he was telling a story about a night hike with some soldiers and to illustrate what happened he grabbed me by the arm and then started pushing me from behind up an imaginary hill.  It took me by surprise, but I did tell him I like to move at my own pace when hiking.

I found him to be engaging, authentic and sincere.  I can see now why the face to face meetings are so important on the campaign trail.  I don't think I would have ever considered voting for Biden himself (and I did vote for the Obama/Biden ticket) but after getting to know him on a more personal level he became a real person to me that I like.  And the interesting thing is, that without knowing anything about his politics (well very little) he became a front runner for me just because I like him. 

After very little sleep for two nights in a row, James found me on the couch at 6pm when he got home from work in a sleep drugged state.  Slurring my words and unable to fully open my eyes.  Yes, I am old....and ready for a long winters nap.

 

You Fulfill Me

Two more interesting news tidbits hot off the Iraqi press.

1.  I quote:  "Prime Minister Nuri al-Maliki decided to name the last day the U.S. troops will withdraw from Iraq (December 31st) as "Fulfillment day"."

Apparently since we have stuck to our agreement of 2008 and pulled our troops, there is cause for celebration and a naming of days.  Heretofore and forever, this day shall be know as...one of fulfillment.  Thus it shall be called, wait for it, Fulfillment Day!  Hooray!  Brilliant!

I wonder how it will be celebrated?  All drug prescriptions fulfilled for free?  Everyone has to use the word fulfill in all their sentences that day?  Sign new agreements with friends and then... fulfill them?  The possibilities are endless.  One thing I think we can be sure of, it will include celebratory gunfire.

2.  "Asa'eb Ahl al-Haq is launching attacks on U.S. Forces in order to give the false impression it is forcing withdrawal."

Talk about devilishly clever!  Hey guys, I hear the U.S. army is taking off, I bet...and I may be wrong, but I doubt it....I bet, if we shoot at their backs on the way out everyone will think WE did this good thing!  What do you say?  We'll be heroes!  All in favor?

Hm.  Well, I guess the only real problem with this stroke of brilliance is that small FULFILLMENT DAY detail that's on the lips of everyone these days.  You know, that whole agreement we signed and that has been in the news every day.  All that ceaseless news chatter about the U.S. withdrawing to stick to the agreement and the fact that all the plans have been made and troops have been leaving unassisted for months now.  Yeah, there's that little glitch.

But still, I get how a good idea can go awry.  One time I thought it would be really cool and impressive to my friends if I showed a sweet kung fu kick move to close the latched window on my dad's toyota tercel.  Then it shattered and it didn't seems like such a good idea anymore.  Theory, practice - sometimes you have to test it out to know it's wrong.  I get it.

(But seriously.  Come on.)

Soul Mates - Get Real.

I am a huge fan of Wired magazine.  HUGE.  If you think it is just for tech geeks, you're wrong.  It's for people who love creativity.

In their November issue there was an article featuring the Muppets called, "The scientific way to..."   It has all these interesting facts backed by science.  Like how to get ink out of clothes. 

One struck me as extremely interesting and relevant.  Especially to those of us who married, let's say..later in life.  It's called The scientific way to find a soul mate.  Catch your interest?  Thought so.

Here's the basic facts:

-  There is a probabilistic approach to finding the love of your life called: satisfacing.  Satisfy, suffice, get it?  Basically it means getting a good enough outcome when you're lacking complete information about your options.

-  People who aren't in a committed relationship always come to this fork in the road, "Do I keep looking for something better or stick with what seems pretty good?"

-  The solution they suggest is to date ENOUGH people to set some baseline standards of what works, and then settle down with the next person who exceeds the bar. 

- A baseline should be acheived after dating 12 people.  It was named (and I like this) the "Twelve-Bonk Theory".  Scientific, no? (also applied to home buying and hiring)

- Bottom line: If you've dated less than 12 people feel free to keep looking.  If you have dated more you are probably too picky.  Their words?  "Stop obsessing over your new paramour's dorky laugh."

I think this is fascinating.  When I look back at my looooooonnnnng history of dating, I recognize hitting that fork in the road in every relationship.  Should I stay or should I go?

I even remember at moments of commitment to James (should we be exclusive? engaged?) thinking---is this really it?  Is there something more I should wait for? 
Why was I thinking that?  He was amazing.  And I was in love with him.  And it should be noted, I am thrilled I committed and my hesitation had nothing to do with how great he is.  And it should also be noted that I am not some crown jewel who has any right to be so particular.  Yes, I had a problem with commitment. 

It's classic Seinfeld.  "Oh, she has man-hands."  You know you did it or you're doing it still.  Finding the flaws, waiting for perfection, thinking you will probably end up with Steve Young if you wait.  No, I didn't, maybe, think that when I was in my 20's. 

All I'm saying is, this is some good advice.  Easy for me to say NOW because I took the plunge.  So, I'm curious what those of you who did settle down, and those of you who are still dating and wondering if you're too picky think....should you satisface?   Should you marry the next person who meets your expectations even if you have doubts?
whatcha think?

Let's celebrate Martha...go grab yer gun!

I find it very odd that in a country (OK I find it odd anywhere, but hear me out) where guns and bombs and rockets and IEDs are killing folks on a daily basis, that the chosen practice for celebration would be....gun fire.

Every once in a while we get an alarm that tells us to stay under cover because the Iraq soccer team won another match and they will show their joy through celebratory gun fire.  There is a logical concern that during this celebration of firing guns, you might accidentally get hit with a bullet.  It's so odd to me...I mean has human life lost all value?  (Perhaps so based on my last post.)   How quickly that celebration would turn into mourning.

Back to our warnings at the compound.  I kind of ignored those warnings.  I thought---how would bullets being shot straight up in to the air, miles away from me be any kind of risk?  Yup, that's what I thought.  And so I continued to walk freely around my, er, street feeling utterly free and safe.

Last week we had some C.G.F. (in the spirit of DOS acronyms) and the next day some friends were talking about the danger.  I laughed and shared my complete disregard for this "danger."  They told James and I about one bullet that went through a soldier's roof on the compound and through his BED.  That caught my attention.  They shared a couple other stories, and explained how the bullets could get pretty good distance and still have momentum as they rained down. 

Suddenly I gained greater respect for this "warning."

Apparently there must have been others who like me laughed in the face of this danger, because today we got an all-embassy security email that explained to us simpletons the very real dangers of celebratory gunfire.  this paragraph caught my attention:

Bullets fired into the air will arc and fall back downward at a significantly reduced rate of velocity.  However, the danger posed by the possibility of falling-bullet injuries is still substantial.  The mortality rate of persons struck by bullets in a typical gunshot scenario is 2% to 6%.  Comparatively, the mortality rate of those struck by falling bullets, as in those fired in celebration, is over 32%.  This higher mortality rate is due to the higher likelihood of severe head wounds from falling bullets.

32 percent???  Yes.  Now I get it.  They also shared pictures of a bullet that went through a car roof in the IZ.  As I learned at Root, a picture can paint a thousand words.  This picture pretty much painted three for me...repeated hundreds of times:  Duck. And. Cover.  (Oh, and three more:  celebratory. gunfire. sucks.)
Over.

Another bomb?... yawn...

Let's talk about the news a bit. 

I realized today that I have become immune to my circumstances.  I was scrolling through my email press clippings about Iraq, looking for a headline that might catch my eye and be of interest.  I suddenly realized I had quickly scrolled through:

"Blast in Baghdad kills 15"
"Three IEDs explode killing 8"
"Detonation leaves several wounded, few killed."

Big news?  Nah.  That stuff happens EVERY DAY.  How jaded is it to scroll past those headlines, happening in the city where I live, as I look for something INTERESTING?

If I was in Ann Arbor scanning the news and I saw "Three IEDs kill 8 in Ann Arbor" I'd be shocked.  I would pause, read, reflect, shed a tear, wonder what the heck was going on and if this was a one-time event or a trend.  Point being, it would be "of interest."

I am saddened to think I (and many, many others) live in a place where murder has become yesterday's news.

Alone at last

The word is out...and so is Pizza Hut.  Just found out they are following Subway out the door and on the plane to safety.  I wish I could say good riddance, but even though I've only had it once since I've been here it's somehow comforting to know Pizza is available.

And so, all semblance of American goodness will shortly be gone.  We are waiting with baited breath to find out if the PX (our little mini-mart) will pull out as well.  It's a military thing, and apparently our State budget isn't quite exorbitant enough to cover the costs.  If I've learned one thing about government over here, it's that the defense budget ROCKS.


The PX has been terribly depleted for about 3 weeks now.  No products on the shelves, just signs that say, "We're sorry - the convoy can't get through."  James went to a meeting with the State Undersecretary on Saturday to calm nerves about what will happen here in January and the primary question people asked was, "When will we get toilet paper again??"  The PX is out and apparently some people are running out.  Can you imagine the panic and chaos that will ensue if they don't re-stock soon??

On the positive side, they do tell us that they will try to lease the empty Subway and Pizza Hut spaces to local restauranteurs.  Which means we may be getting a shwarma place, and well, probably another shwarma place.  I think this is good news and many people are happy, but where will we get pizza?

They are also talking about leasing the PX space out to a local market owner....but I'll tell you what that means: zero reliability on quality of product.

I went to one of the local markets with James a couple weeks ago when the PX ran out of flour and brought home 3 weevil-filled bags of goodness.  Sick.  I know the embassy leadership wants us to believe we are going to be "cared for" but it will definitely not be in the manner to which we are accustomed.  We're going native folks.  Netgrocer is my best friend.

And in netgrocer news, I ordered buko-bucks of groceries 3 weeks ago to make James and I and some friends a delicious Thanksgiving dinner and so far....nothing.  4 days for them to make an appearance and then our Thanksgiving will be made up of mashed potatoes and the smoked turkey we found at the PX.  Please Iraqi convoy--bring my netgrocer to me.

Morality Reflections. Pardon the indulgence.

I must pause in my reports from Baghdad to comment on an American current event:  Penn State.

It is shocking that it could capture more publicity than the upcoming presidential election, the withdrawal of troops in Iraq, J-Lo's new boyfriend, or any other majore news, but I can certainly see why it has.  It's shocking on oh-so many levels.

Trust me, I am saddened to see a true college football legacy go out like this (Paterno), but I am deeply saddened that people would be more angered at his departure than the fact that he didn't protect innocent children from sexual abuse.  Deeply saddened.

Today I scanned the news on MSN.com and saw two headlines, literally right next to each other,that made me go "hmmmm." Yes, this is definitely  prime material for a C and C music factory hit:

#1:  Sandusky: "I am innocent"
#2:  Sandusky: "I regret showering with kids"

Really?
I will say no more.  But does this strike anyone else as....JACKED UP??

The Wait is Over

Some of you know, some of you don't.  James and I have been in a bidding nightmare for the last 5 months.  What this means, this "bidding" as they call it, is that every time you finish at one post (like Baghdad) you have to apply for your next job.  It's bizarre.  Imagine you work at Ford and every year or two years you have to re-apply for your job.  "Yes, I know you already hired me and that I've gotten great reviews, but now I'd like you to re-hire me.  And I'd like you to send me to Timbuktu. Oh,and just so you're prepared I'll be re-applying for this same job again in two more years."

So, James looks at a "bid list", posts that have open positions in his cone (public affairs) and at his grade level, and that open at the same time that he'll complete his current post.  Then he picks from that narrowed down list 6-15 that interest him and he starts lobbying people to hire him.  BUT....40 other people may be lobbying for that same job, and will probably know "someone."  So that's the short version.  Trust me, I'm sparing you a lot of painful details and beurocratic nonsense.  Like the fact that because he served in Baghdad he is supposed to be offered an early handshake to a "garden post."  This is a lie.

Long story short, after feeling rejected for about 4 months and wondering what we would do with ourselves when we had no next post, we suddenly were showered in offers.  From all 4 corners of the world.  I was very proud of James for being selected the number one option for (drumroll)...

1. Praia, Cape Verde
2. Rabat, Morocco
3. Chegdu, China
4. Tbilisi, Georgia

Much debate ensued after this richness of posts was placed in our grasp.  Just as it is difficult to have no riches, we discovered it is also difficult to have too much.  How do you pick amongst a vacation island, a very cool Middle East Garden spot near the infamous Casablanca, China (I don't know what to say here but my mom assures me it was her number one pick), and an up and coming European hot spot that has the old world charm of Italy 20 years ago? (Reliable sources also tell us that it has the climate of North Carolina and that the food is to die for.)

We decided.  We will be returning to D.C. in September to study Georgian for one year before heading over to Tbilisi in September 2013.  We're really excited and hope that many of you will come and visit us in our posh new digs!

(Note:  We are also starting to consider international adoption--if any of you have insights or experience with this - please contact us~any advice would be awesome!)

Baa Bye Ba'athist.

 I don't know how closely you all follow Iraq shenanigans, but recently there was a little drama over a government decision to round up some wild and crazy "Ba'athists."  Lest you think that is someone saying Baptist with a lisp, it is NOT.  I may or may not have thought that before I learned it was the party Sadaam Hussein belonged to.  Apparently, that wasn't on E News.

Anywho, it was a little, how you say, scary and big brother-ish the way the government suddenly started a roundup and people weren't happy.  There was some protesting in the streets and some angry mobs who somehow didn't think it was very democratic and neighborly to just bust up in people's houses and take them because of their religion or political preferences.  Crazy.

There was a news bulletin that came across my computer screen a few days back with bullets from a talk given by Prime Minister Maliki to soothe some nerves.  I'm not sure if that worked, but I will say I find some of these bullets amusing....if I'm honest, more because of the way they are written and because everytime I read Ba'ath or Ba'athist I say it in my head like a sheep would.  Whatcha think?  I'll put in parenthesis the thoughts I had as I read this.  Lucky. You.

Ba’athist Plot: (Assumption:  there IS in fact a Ba'athist plot)

• We detained 615 Ba’athists so far.

• The Ba’ath party is politically banned by the Constitution.  (Can you do that??Let's ban the tea party!  We the people believe...)

• We are not indiscriminately arresting Ba’athists.  We have retained a number of former Ba’athists who gave up their “bad Ba’ath ideologies” and are still occupying very sensitive position in the government. There is a difference between those “good” Ba’athists and other Saddamist Ba’athists who are plotting against the country by collaborating with al-Qaida and conducting bombings and assassinations.  (This is the best one...goooood ba'athist...baaaaadddd Ba'athist.  Rooststers, you know what I'm talking about.  They gave up their "bad Ba'athist ideologies??"  awesome.)

• Some of these “Saddamist Ba’athists” are plotting a coup, thinking there will be a security void after the withdrawal of U.S. forces, but they are mistaken as we [the GOI] are already responsible for security even with the presence of U.S. troops.  (uh-huh, big mistake to think the GOI can't handle security, I mean they've only had their security bombed and killed like every day last week by terrorists.  Yeah, they got this one.)

• The detentions have no relation with sectarianism, it is the Ba’athists who believe and think in a sectarian way.  (It's YOU, not me.)

•  There is no harm if we tighten the grip on all political, security and economic situations in accordance with the Constitution.  (It's a slippery slope Sada...um, Maliki.  Just a LITTLE tightening can't hurt.)

• There are some countries that support Ba’athists, but I will [wait] and disclose their names in the “proper time.”  (OK, wait THIS one is the best--is this third grade?  i will wait and disclose their names at the proper time??? when? when?  who could these countries be--no ONE knows.....ira..no one.)

Hoarding = Food Storage

A few days ago we were told some things which I'm not sure if I can say on the blog about our future conditions here.  I will not say them for fear of jeopardizing our position, safety and strategy...but I will tell you this:  I have started to hoard food.  Don't judge me.  If you thought emergency rations might be in your future, you would to.

I will also tell you that we are losing our APO.  This is a tragedy.  It means that our mail service just got a lot slower and less reliable.  We're hoping to get a DPO, but that is not confirmed.  If we don't, it means...no boxes.  And that means, goodbye aveda.  Farewell j.crew.  Adios netgrocer.  nooooooooooo.....

A huge shout out to Gina Valenti of Hilton and Hampton and general friendship fame.  Today, James and I got a box in the mail that we didn't order and weren't planning on getting.  It was from popcornopolis and it was bursting with individual packages of flavored popcorn(s).  I can only assume she took pity on us after reading about how our popcorn popper broke.  We HEART Gina!!!!  There is NOTHING like a care package and nothing like popcorn, and nothing like a friend who remembers you!

Back to Baghdad.  I left the compound for the first time this week.  James and our friend Stewart and I walked across the street (basically) and up the road about 1/2 a mile to a place aptly named "FOB Union 3."  OK, I have no idea what that means, but I'm sure if I did that it would be apt.

It's a military base and a little Arabic shopping mini-mall all in one.  Got yer rugs, got yer Genie lamps, your mini-grocer, your awesome sexy lingerie and got yer popeye's chicken.  Yup, they got it all.

James and I went in search of flour because the PX has been out for over two weeks and I wanted to make Swedish bread. 

We were very excited to find a store that had 3 bags full.  (yes sir, yes sir, three bags full!)  Being kind-hearted Christians (that's right, Dr. Robert Jeffress) we gave away one bag to a friend of James' who entered the store after us and was very sad-faced to find an empty shelf.  That left two.

Until I opened one after we left to make sure it was white (the bag said wheat, but the picture was white.)  It was white.  White flour COVERED in weevils. 

iiiiiccccccckkkkk.

i almost threw up.  the man was kind enough to give us our money back and we found 4 more bags in a second store bringing our total up to five (remember: hoarding) but I am terrified to open each of them.  I am saddened to have to depend on flour that says wheat, is white and could have sat on a shelf for years. 

but.

I'm grateful for flour.  And the swedish bread it made.  Now I must go and eat 12 bags of popcorn.

The Simple Things

I am happy today.  No.  I feel JOY. 

When you live in Baghdad it really, truly boils down to the simple things folks.  Like no duck and covers ALL WEEK.   How 'bout them apples?  (I have to admit as soon as I write that I get jumpy that I'm setting us up for one..)

The last couple days have been filled with little pleasures that I would probably fail to appreciate if I was back in the States.  Listed in no particular order:

1.  The powers that be allowed local farmers to come in to the embassy compound on Saturday and hold a small farmers market.  I bought fresh fruit and vegetables.  And EGGS!  Oh, joy!

2.  Today with my vegetables (that included jalapenos- bless you Iraq -) I made a batch of fresh salsa.  It was the most heavenly thing I've tasted since I've been here.  Thank you Kristin's cooking blog for the delicious recipe: http://efnrecipes.blogspot.com/

3.  My mother sent us our first care package.  HOORAY!!  It included, M&Ms and they didn't melt!!  There is no chocolate here because for some reason it always melts in transit.  My chocolate chips that I sent through our shipment were one solid block of chocolate when they arrived.  Through my mother's brilliance our chocolate drought was saved.  In her words, "I just figured it would work, cause, they melt in your mouth - not in your hands."  Brilliant.  Other awesome items in care package- mascara, halloween decorations, the wedding magazine our wedding was published in, and all kinds of food stuffs for cooking.  Bless you Delsa.  Good show!

4.  I just noticed that everything is about food.  What can I say, I'm a simple girl with simple needs.

I never knew a jalapeno could make me weep with joy.  Or that m&ms were the hero of the chocolate world - but this Baghdad after all.  And life is good.

Zero

Well, this weekend the breaking news was NO troops in 2012.  Looks like the negotiations are done, and Obama has made his decision.  I was asked to shoot the Western media round table with the Ambassador for this announcement.

I have mixed feelings.  I do think it's time to bring our guys and gals home...people are tired of the Iraq war and it's hard to see if there are real benefits.  On the other hand, since being here and talking to the troops I get the sense that they don't feel ready to go.  Some are ready of course, but many feel like their mission isn't over.  They want to help put the pieces of the country back together and to help stabilize the area - leaving now feels a bit like failure.

Leaving also creates potential problems with Iran.  And most importantly, it impacts me.  And the other embassy diplomats here. 

Suddenly I'm losing not only Subway, but a lot of security.  And it doesn't help when the finger waving, American-hating Sadr stands up and says that he considers diplomats invaders too and that if we stay we should die.  Of course we've just become a lot easier target too, which is nice for him.

I don't know what is right, but living over here has certainly muddied up the issue for me.  Should we stay or should we  go?

The Ultimate Answer to Nature vs. Nurture.

Today we continued learning how to run the T.V. studio.  

I was actually feeling like I had started to make good progress.  I learned the difference between a video distribution amplifier and an audio distribution amplifier, I connected the General to a live feed from Washington, D.C., and I have even been up on the roof and got up close and personal with our satellite dish. 

And then Sgt Buenavista dropped the bomb.  He told me that today was the day we looked at schematics.  You know, so i could actually understand WHY or HOW things were working and fix them instead of just memorizing step by step processes to get things done. 

These are some of the schematics.  They tell you how to troubleshoot a problem by illustrating the flow between all the inputs and outputs...in this particular image, for just the audio in the studio.  (I encourage you to click on the image and really get a feel for this page.)  Just the audio.

So why is this post about nature vs. nurture?  This is a true ultimate fighting challenge.  Have you met my dad?  He tried to fix a shelf for my mom in a kitchen cupboard, and in the process ripped off the cupboard door instead.  

I called Abram when we bought a new TV this summer and asked him to help me figure out the directions and "make it work."  I believe we were dealing with about 1 "input" and 1 "output."

I'll tell you what this means to me.  If I succeed...  If I in fact beat genetics... I am never, ever going to have to ask anyone how to fix a dvd player or, I don't know, how to build a space station again.

Sell-out. Traitor. Deserter.

You heard me Subway. 
Apparently, the fresh eatin' won't be happening here in paradise too much longer. 

For those of you who don't know, we eat in a "mess hall" otherwise known as the DFAC every day.  We are provided with nice food, but after a while the options start to get a little old.  To provide us with some diversity, we have two mini franchises in the building where our Rec Center is housed - Subway and Pizza Hut.

It truly is a nice option once in a while to say, "hey.  i think i want to pretend i live in America and pay for my food... my fast food."  It's refreshing.

Well today in my inbox we were given notice that come November 15th, not only are the troops continuing to ship out, but Subway's going with them. 

What??? 
I can only believe the old adage is true, "If you can't take the heat get out of the kitchen."  They see the writing on the wall.  And that writing says GET OUT WHILE YOU CAN.

Which Subway employee is going to decide, hm...the troops are leaving?  The Embassy will be largely unprotected?  Yes, sign me up to go to Baghdad and make sandwiches.  Sounds divine.  I'm sure if there is one thing that would make a career in sandwich-making even more inviting, it's doing it in Baghdad.

Well, fine.  Another step towards desolation.  Farewell Subway - thank you for sharing your fresh eating with us for as long as you could.  I really didn't care for your sandwiches anyway...but...

...Pizza Hut....don't go.  Please.

Ka.....BOOOOM!!!!

That is the sound that sent me flying off the living room couch at 11:35pm last night. 

James was sick, so I thought I'd let him get some rest and sleep on the couch.  I fell asleep around 10:45 or 11, when all of a sudden I heard something that sounded a lot like, well, a bomb.  Or what I imagined a bomb sounded like from my many years of movie-watching experience.

This is what I know:  It was loud and it exploded...and it sounded close.  Really close.

I flew off the couch and the explosion was soon followed by, "neeee noooowwww...duck and cover...stay away from the windows...." as I ran around the corner, James came flying out of our room looking like a mad scientist (hair on end, eyes bugged out looking left and right, arms waving).  I guess he panicked when he realized I wasn't in bed with him.  And something exploded.  That's an important point.

We both huddled in the bathroom on the floor, sick and dazed, and then finally crawled back to bed. 

Usually I fall right back to sleep after the alarm, this time not so much.  I'd heard the duck and covers, but I'd never heard actual rocket-fire.  It sucked.  Big time.  I spent a long time awake, thinking about rocket fire and how I'm pretty sure I don't like it and how I still had 11 months left here.  I imagined all the scenarios of us being shellacked by bombs and rockets with the military gone, and I didn't like the picture I was painting.

So I thought about Lindt chocolates pelting me instead and fell right to sleep.

This morning when I went to work I discovered where the rocket hit.  And I don't think I can say too much here, but I will tell you this--I can see where it landed from my window, and our apartment is right in the line of fire, oh, within throwing distance.  You should take in to account I have a remarkably good throwing arm, but still. 

In the building next door to us we can see where some of the shrapnel hit the windows. 

We're back to normal now, but it all just got real-er.  I hope this is as real as it gets.  Time to put in a request for a new apartment. 

Date Night

Due to the fact that we live a groundhog-like (the movie) existence here, and we have very limited movement and options of things to do, James suggested we start having a date night and getting creative.

I thought that might be challenging considering the fact that we live on a one street compound where daily life involves: waking up, exercising, walking to work, walking to the DFAC for lunch, walking back to work, walking home, going to the DFAC for dinner, and then reading, playing a game or watching a show on our i-pad.  And going to be around 9:30 pm.  Yes, you read it right.

James was up for the challenge.  On Friday night he planned our first date night - and it was quite creative.  Massages and a trip to an art museum.

How? you ask.  (you do, you really do.)

Well, it just so happens that in our med center there are 3 massage chairs that we are allowed to come in and use at our leisure anytime we need to decompress.  So James and I enjoyed about 45 minutes of heart (and body pounding) massages in those chairs. 

Next, James had discovered that there were some famous paintings on the second floor of the building we work in.  So he took me on a very exclusive tour.  We rode up to the second floor, walked over to the two painting, looked at them and commented on them and thoroughly enjoyed just the right amount of culture in our lives.  (in my opinion.)

That folks, was a more creative date than I've been on in a long time.  Ironically in the states where we have so many options at our fingertips, we usually end up with dinner and a movie.  Don't you wish you were in Baghdad where creative dates abound?

 

Better than US Weekly

Are you freaking kidding me? 

Every day I get a stream of press clippings in my inbox because I work in the Public Affairs section.  All the news related to Iraq and the region that the team finds gets consolidated and emailed.  Usually I skim it and if I find something interesting, I read the article. 

Today....today.  Oh, today I stopped in my skimming and laughed out loud.  And it's not funny, it really, really isn't.  But sometimes the shocking makes you laugh.

Examples of headlines I see every day are, "There will be forces in Iraq, but very limited number" and "Still no immunity offered for U.S. trainers."  In between two of those I see this gem:

Sadr: If my finger were American, I would have cut it off (al-Sumaria, October 10)

(I can only assume he's showing us exactly which one here)

I'm sorry, that is ridiculous.  Because seriously, IF his finger were American I highly doubt he would have it cut off.  I mean that would just be stupid and it would just be hurting himself.  How would he point so effectively? 

James suggested that he might just have his finger renounce it's citizenship - it seems much more logical than amputation.

Basically, there are numerous routes he could choose while still saving the American finger.  Why so hasty, friend?  I can tell you this, if I had a finger that was Iraqi, I would make peace with it, and use it for good.

If you're interested here is the full quote:

"In a response to one of his follower's question about some Iraqi officials calling to keep U.S. forces in Iraq, Sadr said, "I am not satisfied with the presence of the occupiers. I am not content with the presence of U.S. forces, military bases, instructors, security companies or the embassy."

Sadr added, "If my finger were American, I would have cut it off."

What a gem.  Now THAT'S news.

(Note:  I don't like how that bodes for us at the Embassy come January.)

WHERE IS MY BED???

I know that you are all probably bored of reading about Duck and Covers by now, and frankly,  a lot of people here are tired of them too.  In my last D&C post, I mentioned that they are quite shocking, but I didn't realize exactly how disconcerting they are until last night.

It was about 2:45 a.m. when I was jarred from deep sleep by the siren blaring and the megaphone in my ear "Duck and Cover...."  I can't explain how it feels - but it's shocking.  I bolted up in bed, looked around, tried to figure out where the heck I was and who was yelling at me, and then I got out of bed and plodded to the bathroom floor.  Totally disoriented.

James seems to be impacted a bit more strongly than I am, and is clearly not only more disconcerted, but all his survival skills kick in to high gear.  He is always worried that he has survival tools nearby in these duck and covers....like bottles of water (he can't really go longer than 30 minutes without water), first aid kit....and in the house - a blanket and pillow.  I'm not totally sure why, because I've never heard of a D&C that lasts longer than 45 minutes and I've never been in one longer than 15...and seriously, I'm not going to go back to sleep in the bathroom, wake up and move back to bed again in that amount of time.  Plus I'm a little too wired at that point to sleep.

Last night I noticed James had a blanket around his shoulders when we got to the bathroom, but I didn't pay much attention to it.  I did wonder why it was just around his shoulders and we didn't spread it on the cold floor to sit on, but I was tired, and I don't talk when I'm tired.  A few moments later the duck and cover ended and we were told it was safe to go back to bed.

As I walked into our room, I saw James standing on his side of the bed, looking confused and holding a sheet in his hand.  I glanced next at the bed and saw that it was completely devoid of any type of covering.  Did not compute.  He looked confused, I felt confused and then I realized....James had taken the sheet, the blanket AND the comforter with him off the bed when he left for the bathroom.  What neither of us could figure out was WHY.  Why would he do this???

I was so tired and PMS'ing and irrational that I was suddenly furious that I couldn't get in to bed.  The only thing I wanted was to get in bed....why. couldn't. I?  (fist shaking at the heavens...why???)  I simultaneously knew that I was being irrational, and that it would only take a few minutes to make the bed, so I tried to control it, but as we stood there making the bed together I kept asking him, "Why?  Why would you do that?"  And he kept trying to explain himself, with words like uh, and um,  but of course he couldn't.  So I (of course) asked more.

It was the most surreal, confusing experience yet of our short marriage.  Today I thought about it and laughed out loud because it was so strange, so Iraq, and so "James".  But last night...

Popcorn (not) Popping

Last night James and I decided to watch a movie and make popcorn.  We had never used our popcorn maker before and we were really excited.  As you can may have deduced from the picture to the left, things did not go as planned.  Pliers are not usually a necessary tool in the popcorn-making process.

When I pulled out the popper, things were jangling around inside the machine.  I looked for the on-off button and it had broken and fallen inside the machine.

First James and I tried to turn it on with pliers and see if it would still work, but instead it almost combusted and filled our kitchen with smoke.

Fine.  So we tried plan B, and cooked it on the stove.  45 minutes later we had about 1 bowl of popcorn, a handful for burnt kernels and a less than delicious treat.  This is a tragedy.  Popcorn was going to be one of my "treats" here in Iraq and not only has our popcorn maker been destroyed, but we never even got to use it once.  I shake my fist at the FS shipping people.  You....(fist shaking)...

Well, time to go to the mysterious PX where you can find everything and nothing and see if they miraculously stocked a popcorn popper this week.  Probably next to the garage door opener.

The Coins

On Wednesday we recorded a remote presentation that the Commanding General needed to give at a dinner in the States.  (General Austin). 

His entourage showed up first to make sure everything was set up appropriately, so that it would run smoothly when he arrived.  Everyone seemed a little nervous and anxious to please him.  I had no idea what he looked like, but when he showed up you understood why people listened to him.  He had a very commanding presence and he felt like a leader.  Of course I wasn't intimidated because, well, I directed Morgan Freeman...once. (j/k)

I introduced myself to him and started to mic him up.  He asked me where I was from and I told him, "Michigan."  He asked if I was a wolverines fan and I replied that I was.  He thought I should meet someone in his office to talk football and I told him that we would only enjoy that conversation for the first 5 or 6 games until they started a slow decline for the rest of the season.  He got a big kick out of that.  Then I told him my other team (the red sox) had imploded that morning and we had more good conversation about that. 

I thought he was really kind and impressive, and I made him laugh a few times and during the rest of the shoot when there was a break he would ask me questions like, "So who does Michigan play this week?" 

After the shoot, he took some photos with the soldiers there and chatted about how many tours they had been on.  When he finished he reached his hand out to shake mine and I said, "One tour."  He smiled and said, "We need a picture with this young lady too."  So, I was honored to get my picture with him as well.  You can see we are about the same size.  Give or take.

What really surprised me was a few minutes after he left, the Sergeants and I were chatting in the studio about how the shoot went and General Austin suddenly came back in.  He held his hand out to me and gave me one of his coins. 

For those of you who don't know, the military guys here have coins.  They give them out to soldiers when they do a commendable job, or as a reward.  I got a coin from General Helmick last week after filming (he gave one to the other guys there and one to me) and he told me, "The deal with the coins is that you always have to carry it with you.  If I see you and ask for the coin and you don't have it - you have to buy me a drink.  If you do have it, I have to buy you a drink."  Mostly it is an honor for the soldiers to get coins, and it's a sign of recognition for a job well done.

I was so surprised and flattered that he would come all the way back to give me a coin, and after he left for the second time, I was even more honored when his aide commented that he has never given one to a civilian before.

So this is my moment of pride.  I got a coin from General Austin.   And whether you get it or not, that is pretty cool.

Sandstorm!

OK, so nothing like the picture posted earlier in my blog, but still - it had the makings.

I walked out of work around 5:30 and the sky was sort of eerily...sandy/brown colored.  It was a little more humid than usual and the air seemed thick.  The sun was blocked and the wind was blowing.  And usually the air is pretty dead still. 

Sand wasn't blowing everywhere, but it freaked me out.  I thought...this must be the beginning.  It's going to hit anytime.  I picked up my pace to get home and I wondered if I should call James to warn him to leave soon so he didn't get stuck.  I wondered if we would get shut up in our house for days, and I was worried we hadn't scavenged enough food from the grab and go for our fridge and we would starve.  And by starve I mean we would get really, really hungry for 24 hours. 

No storm.  But I can't describe how strange it felt.  I've lived in all kinds of weather, but I've never felt anything like that.  Strange color, strange stillness, and the uncomfortable expectation of the unknown and un-experienced fear.

I guess that's what is scariest here in Baghdad - not having ANY idea what to expect from anything.  When the rocket hits will it be loud?  Will it throw me or bust through the wall?  When the sandstorm hits will we be blinded or stuck inside for days?  When I show up with my paper money at home will anyone take it?

Yeah, it's a strange new world.  But I figure it's going to help me overcome my fear of anything, including and especially the unknown by the time I get back.  That would be a nice blessing.

acronyms

As mentioned the State Department and the military are huge (HUGE) fans of acronyms.  The funny thing is that now that their paths have diverged here in Baghdad they're discovering that they have acronyms with the same letters that mean different things.  Which basically throws a huge wrench in communication.

I rarely understand a thing that is being said, but occasionally I make up an acronym and throw it in the mix cause I figure no one's going to notice.  And if they do, they won't want to admit they don't know it so we'll all carry on. 

A couple nights ago at a farewell barbque for one of my colleagues, as we were saying goodbye, I said, "and hey...K.I.T., k?" 

He looked at me blankly.  I said, "uhhhh, it's an acronym - I'm trying to fit in.  Keep In Touch, dude." 

He said, "You're 13."  In shock.

He missed the point.  13 was the last time we made up so many acronyms that we didn't have to use real words.  What does that say about the DOS and MIL? 
Face.  (and yes, I am 13.)

A Glitch in the Matrix

 I haven't seen the Matrix.  I know, it's shocking so get it out of your system and when you're done being shocked that I missed it, come on back and keep reading.

Ready?  James HAS seen the Matrix.  And loves it.  I know this because he finds an analogy for everything to the Matrix.  

Recently, he started telling about a concept in the movie that they called "glitch in the matrix."  You think your world is real, and then you see little glitches that make you wonder.  Things start to unravel.

James and I have started calling out to each other what these glitches are when we see them.  Some might say the duck and cover is a glitch.  Other glitches could be the bus stop sign....on our one street home... and no bus.  Perhaps the streets named "Hollywood" and "Peachtree" - seriously?  Anyway, you get the idea.  

My most favorite glitch is the money.   Well, the coins.  One day we went in to the PX to buy some household supplies.  I gave the cashier my good, American money and my change was a dollar bill...and these:

I thought it was hilarious that he was clearly handing me back cheap cardboard tokens for my real money... and that he thought he could get away with it.  I cracked a joke, "Oh, yours look pretty good, but the ones I've been making at home look even better."

Blank stare. (Granted, English wasn't his first language, but come on.)

I also find it funny that they are called "gift certificates."  As if I had gotten a gift from the store and not actually earned that change.  And that this gift certificate could be redeemed for 25 cents.  Wow! 

Some might also say it is funny and maybe a bit ironic that on the "gift certificates" is the slogan Operation Enduring Freedom (how much can it endure with cardboard change I ask you?) and the representation of that Operation is a camel and a soldier staring each other down.

"That's right camel...you heard me.  I'm here to bring you enduring freedom.  You gonna get on board or make it tough?"  I say that's a battle we can win!

I make fun, and it really is a little crazy, no?  I mean when I leave here do you think Banana Republic and Albertson's will accept my gift certificates?

Duck & Cover Take 2

3:45 am.

Sound asleep.

Suddenly a wailing siren and the words, "You must take cover..." are blaring into my consciousness, jolting me awake.  I have finally found a way to be awoken that is even less pleasant than my dad's trick when I was in high school of turning the light on at 6am and dragging all the covers off the bed until I woke up. 

Imagine you are sound asleep and suddenly someone is standing with a megaphone right next to the side of your bed screaming "Get out of bed or die!!"  Accompanied by a fire engine like siren.  That's what it felt like.

James and I lept from bed, and bleary-eyed and half conscious, we fled to the bathroom.  Where we sat on cold linoleum for about 15 minutes.  Staring at each other. 

I asked, "Do you think I can go to the bathroom while we're in here?"  Don't ask me why, but at 3am it seemed logical that sitting on the pot might lead to death.

It was shocking.  I don't mind ducking and covering when I am already awake, but I am a gal who values her beauty rest.  This ain't cool extremist people.  Go to sleep.  Let's deal with death when we're alert, huh?

This morning we learned there was a bomb in Baghdad that killed 5...apparently that was what the duck and cover was all about.  We were luckier in the embassy than the poor Iraqi's in the city center.   And this is a "lull" in the violence.  Seriously, not cool.